rowan {circus gremlin}'s Post

A bit ago, I was talking with my therapist about my identity, being nonbinary but also feeling like every step towards femme I take is unquestionably right. The question I had - which I can't answer - is what's the hard thing? Is the hard thing being fully femme, and all its logistical hurdles? Or is the hard thing forging my own nonbinary path through genderland, where fewer people have gone? It's a hard question, made harder because there's a lot of trans experiences I don't share (and a lot that I do), and my brainworms like to come back at me with AM I EVEN TRANS? Or, slightly less bluntly, am I trans ENOUGH?

I sit with myself at #TheCoffeehouse, with these brainworms, and she looks at me, and she says, "honey, the question you should be asking yourself is not 'what's the hard thing' but 'what's the easy thing?'" And I have to stop before I trip over myself, because she's right. The easy thing is what my brainworms are feasting on. Obviously the easy thing is not being trans.

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